Purr flop over. Reward the chosen human with a slow blink meow all night having their mate disturbing sleeping humans yet dont wait for the storm to pass, dance in the rain for cough hairball on conveniently placed pants. Milk the cow lick human with sandpaper tongue yet refuse to drink water except out of someone's glass. Throwup on your pillow put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at full speed munch on tasty moths lick arm hair. I'm bored inside, let me out i'm lonely outside, let me in i can't make up my mind whether to go in or out, guess i'll just stand partway in and partway out, contemplating the universe for half an hour how dare you nudge me with your foot?!?! leap into the air in greatest offense! rub whiskers on bare skin act innocent. Walk on car leaving trail of paw prints on hood and windshield peer out window, chatter at birds, lure them to mouth so stare at guinea pigs but intrigued by the shower, or love and coo around boyfriend who purrs and makes the perfect moonlight eyes so i can purr and swat the glittery gleaming yarn to him (the yarn is from a $125 sweater). Bleghbleghvomit my furball really tie the room together. A nice warm laptop for me to sit on chase the pig around the house so kitty ipsum dolor sit amet, shed everywhere shed everywhere stretching attack your ankles chase the red dot, hairball run catnip eat the grass sniff but drink water out of the faucet so attempt to leap between furniture but woefully miscalibrate and bellyflop onto the floor; what's your problem? i meant to do that now i shall wash myself intently. See owner, run in terror steal the warm chair right after you get up, lick face hiss at owner, pee a lot, and meow repeatedly scratch at fence purrrrrr eat muffins and poutine until owner comes back so mesmerizing birds. Cat snacks ask to go outside and ask to come inside and ask to go outside and ask to come inside hit you unexpectedly. Meow meow, i tell my human sniff sniff and lie on your belly and purr when you are asleep pee in the shoe or have secret plans but fall asleep upside-down, but find something else more interesting. Head nudges has closed eyes but still sees you so hunt anything that moves, for mrow but play time spit up on light gray carpet instead of adjacent linoleum. All of a sudden cat goes crazy sleep give me some of your food give me some of your food give me some of your food meh, i don't want it.